Vidlers 5 and 10’s Blog

I need to update like I need a cowtail!
September 18, 2010, 12:04 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

A man came in with two little boys, each of whom got a $5 limit on their spending money, which apparently was too much for them. “I should’ve said two,” the man joked. The first kid, who was very polite and earnestly thanked me after I’d rung up his purchases, did well with his price range, and immediately after said, “Thanks, Mr. so and so,” so I knew that the $5 limit man wasn’t his dad, as I’d assumed. That was very nice, I thought. The man’s actual son was a different story – while he was also very polite, he went about a dollar over, but the dad just let him forget it. He tried to make him put something back, “you don’t need a cowtail,” he said, which amused me. I wanted to make some kind of joke, like, “none of us need cowtails, except cows!” but the kid chose to put back a Sugar Daddy, which was more expensive, anyway. “I need that like I need a cowtail” is going to be my new “I need that like a hole in the head.”


Golden Oldies
September 14, 2010, 3:25 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

               A mother and her little boy came in, and he asked about going downstairs. The mother said they couldn’t get down there with the stroller when I helpfully chimed in, “You know, we have an elevator,” whereupon she turned around and shook her head at me with a slight smile that said, “I just don’t want to go down there.” Some other passing customers noticed it and laughingly remarked, “Fie on you, store person!”

             I sold a ‘storage bag’ of bridge mix (chocolate covered nuts, fruits, and some strange jelly things) to an old man. It weighed about 7 or 8 pounds and cost over $40 with tax. He explained to me that he needed it “for winter.” I think he was an icognito squirrel.

                    A few days after that I sold all of our storage bags of sponge candy and a huge bag of melty mints to an old woman. It had to be close to $60 worth of candy (I don’t know, as she had to charge it, which meant she had to go to a separate register.)

Vintage Revisited (Continued)
September 4, 2010, 12:09 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

One of my first days at the candy counter, a woman came and asked for four orange Mexican Hats, specifically. (Mexican hats are these gummy candies that look, well, like Mexican Hats. They’re quite popular.) “You’re gonna think I’m really weird,” she’d said, but I thought she was just specific. Today another woman came and asked for all orange Mexican Hats too, and I remarked that I’d had someone else do that, too. “It might have been my neighbor,” she said, who was a chef. Turns out the orange mexican hats make perfect Elmo noses for cupcakes. Mystery solved. I dug thirty out for this woman, but was later told that we’re not supposed to do that, as it ruins the color ratio. Whoops. She sure appreciated it though!

Another little girl came in with her mother and said, “I would love ALL that stuff in there,” and pointed vaguely to books. I’m not sure what she really meant, but my line of vision was a straight line to a rack of shotglasses.
We got so many bandanas today, and in so many varieties, that I was tempted to make “zombie game” jokes all day, but couldn’t, because no one I work with went to Goucher. And as none of you did either, you probably have no idea what I’m talking about. Whoops.
I also met a woman who was a member of a walking club and had walked in all 50 states! She wasn’t young, either. I asked her what her favorite was and she said Alaska.
A 97-year-old man came in, too, and moved around impressively! (He bought a CD.)

More “Vintage Classics” (from various days):
September 3, 2010, 1:46 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I sold 4 pounds of Swedish Fish to one woman who said she “couldn’t get them where she lived.” I wonder where that is. Obviously not Sweden. Wakka Wakka Wakka!
I got in this morning and started to put away any misplaced items, one of which was a very popular screaming launching monkey dressed like Zoro (well, wearing a cape and a mask. I associate that with Zoro.) I’ve learned to tune out the sounds of their shrieking when kids play with them, but I didn’t want to be the cause of the noise. I picked it up gingerly and took care not to accidentally set it off, only to plop it down in its place carelessly and make it shriek. The sad thing was, no one even seemed to notice.
Some of our first customers were a couple who asked for “those hats old ladies wear in the rain.” I took them to the “vintage ladies’ wear” aisle (eyelet sleep nets, hairnets, bouffaunt shower caps, curlers, rain hats, etc) and they excitedly bought one and curlers. The man said it was for him. I asked if it was for a costume and he said “maybe.” They then asked me if we carried fake puke. I said yes and remarked that now I was really curious, and the man laughingly told me that if I knew, they’d have to kill me. Once I showed them the puke, or barf as the industry term is, the woman informed me that it was for a 40th birthday party.
I’m still not completely sure I understand the barf.

Throwback Entry (perhaps this should have been first)
September 2, 2010, 1:51 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

The very first blog entry I ever wrote (really just a reflection on my first day):

I worked the main floor my first day, which I really enjoyed. Yesterday I had candy, which is nuts (pun intended ish). It’s mostly older people who are nostalgic, or kids paying for airheads and poprocks in change. It’s known as an “impulse buy” place, so there’s lots of last-minute additions and sudden crowds. It was a little overwhelming the first day for me, and I dropped enough candy on the counter to fill a stocking (well, maybe of a naughty child, anyway.) I had a profound hatred for liccorice sticks by the end of the day (they’re the most complicated to handle, I’ve found.)
Today I worked there in the morning and I really enjoyed it, though. I guess it just takes practice.

I’m Going To Have To Come Up With Some New Directions
September 1, 2010, 3:35 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

           One of the questions any clerk at Vidler’s is most often asked is, “where are your restrooms?” and everyone’s answer varies slightly. This is not to say that we all give different locations to intentionally trip up our beloved customers, but that everyone’s directional point of view is slightly different. “Right across from the card shop,” is one answer, or “straight and then make a right.” I choose to give directions that include what I, personally, would pay the most attention to, so I make sure to mention that the bathrooms are in the room with the large paper mâché shapes hanging from the ceiling. Based on the flashes of confused  horror I’d noticed in the eyes of customers as of late, I’ve been wondering if my standard answer to the question – “straight through the candle shop, and in the room with the piñatas, it’s on your right” is too long and complicated. Today, when an elderly gentleman asked The Question, my fears were confirmed. After I’d rattled off my answer to the customer with the automated animation of a flight attendant in an instructional video, he pleasantly inquired, “in the piano shop?”

(To clarify for any yet-to-visit-ers or people haven’t been in awhile: Vidler’s Store may sell a lot of things, but pianos are not among them.)